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Thursday, November 24, 2011

Pleasing Others


About 4 weeks ago, I prayed that the Lord would break me of the dreadful fear of rejection by those I care about - that He would break me of being a people pleaser.  You know, that panic and terror that says "I cannot bear to think that (anyone I care about) is alive in this world and thinking ill of me."  After one of the toughest weeks of my life, where I was placed in a position where silently doing what I felt was right, meant risking the good opinion of some of my favourite people (not being able to explain to them), fighting not to justify myself to all and sundry, something in me broke, and I chose silence. 

I want to share this for Gooseberry Garden this week, despite writing it last week.  I believe that such changes as this bring hope - at least, they do to me!  I can think of nothing better to share for 'change, hope', even if it doesn't match November and Winter.  Hope you enjoy! 

On the death of pleasing others

There comes a moment
When all hope is lost.
You know you tried your best
But still
The words fell like rain
on wind tossed seas
vanished, unnoticed
into the depths

There comes a moment
When you stand
silent
still
beyond trying
to halt the flood
of opinion
filling the creaking hold
faster than you can bail

and you realise
that there came a moment
when with a mighty crack
approbation's mast
splintered and crashed
into the storm

wrenching tattered sails
of obsequiousness
with fear's coiled ropes
from this battered hulk
of shipwrecked regard.

In that moment
will self worth cling
to rotting timbers, smashing
against the rocks of others' views?

Or will realisation dawn
that you are not that wrecked vessel
and yielding in relief
loosen your frantic grip
as it slides to final rest
far beneath the broiling surface

Only then, with lightened heart
can you float alone
finding your feet on pristine shores
in jewelled seas
Free at last.

7 comments:

Mystic_Mom said...

Oh Zoe...this is an amazing piece thank you so much for sharing it! What a blessing.

Anonymous said...

tough lesson but each one had to learn it, nice way of dealing with it, enjoyable!
my entry: http://lynnaima.wordpress.com/2011/11/27/wind-chime-melody/

Maxwell Mead Williams Robinson Barry said...

theme fitting,

dynamic and insightful words.

:)

Marbles in My Pocket said...

It is a liberating moment, that one when we realize that there are truly only two opinions of us that matter; our own and God's. I believe if we focus on the latter, the other and others will follow.
Terrific write. God bless!

http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/11/27/those-times-ago/

Linda Bob Grifins Korbetis Hall said...

mind blowing message.

:)

Melissa Ridley Elmes said...

a good lesson to learn, and the sooner, the better. Thanks for sharing!

Maggie Patti Barbara Frankford-Walton said...

very insightful words.



Welcome joining us for poets rally week 57,
A random poem or a free verse is okay.
Hope to see you in.

Happy Weekend!
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Xoxox